should i listen to myself?

i often find myself worrying over things that i make up in my head. Once again this always always goes back to him. Why is my whole thought and mind process always focused around him. I can't seem to funtion daily without him in my head in some way. I really think i may have a problem. obsessed? is that what it is? obsession? what is it? or is it the fact that i can't trust him. I always feel that he'd doing something behind my back, or hiding things from me? i am constantly searching for something to find. I sometimes feel that i should take a step back from this relationship.I never had a dependency problem before and i don't feel that i've ever been hurt? was it from what happened with chris? the things i found out at his funeral? scarred me, for life?

last day of school

I'm very excited to say that today is the last days of finals.. thanks god!This semester has gone by extremely fast, this year has gone by extremly fast! I am pretty proud of my self because i feel that this has probably been the best semester of my 4 years in college so far, grade wise... and life wise.

Things have been pretty good..life has been pretty good. Except for the money situation and in that case i have none. I do need a job. I have been working at the rents but that gets me no money that i physically can see..so i should get a job that i can actually feel the money in my hand. I need to find a internship as well for next year. But it's like once i do that, it's for real, my life as a working girl will have officially started.

I hate the feeling that i being walked over. Not nessasarily walked over, but that i am will to do more then he is willing to do for me. In a relationship i feel that you should want to do anything for someone, and if that feeling is not recipricated then it kinda feels like shit..

love is overrated and at times i feel that i wish i never fell in love